Dating a girl with a cold sore
Having herpes isn’t my distinguishing quality, but it is something I live with that affects my physical health.
I noticed telling my partners got easier as time wore on.
Many people either don’t have a visible sore, or do not know they have herpes, and then pass it on to their partner(s).
But for some, the stigma around herpes can be worse than any of the actual symptoms.
Sometimes, it makes them uncomfortable and they choose not to engage in sexual intimacy, and that’s their choice.
It’s hard, but you have to learn that not everyone will be open enough to hearing your story, but that shouldn’t deter you from being vulnerable and having a normal sex life.
I introduced my viral condition with humor or in a passing comment, and my partners responded with empathy.
Now, I share openly with potential partners well before we have sex.
(However, you can get either strain of the virus on other parts of your body.) You can have either type without exhibiting any symptoms, yet still pass it on to other people via genital secretions or skin to skin contact, which makes herpes a prevalent STI.In fact, in a recent Bustle Trends Group survey of 226 women ages 18 to 34, one participant said, “It’s hard to admit to having had an STI, there’s so many gross assumptions about promiscuity and uncleanliness.” As another respondent put it, “Women are seen as less sexual beings in society which keeps us from being able to talk about issues without some form of shaming from others.” Sadly, the more women with herpes feel shamed, the more the cycle of stigmatizing the STI continues, and the harder it may be to tell a sexual partner you have herpes.According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), more than one out of every six people 14-to-49 years old in the U. have genital herpes, also known as herpes simplex virus type 2 (HSV-2).“Disclosing your herpes status to a potential partner is always stressful, no matter how many times you may have disclosed it in the past or how many intimate relationships followed your disclosures,” she tells Bustle.“But, personally, the partners I have disclosed to in the past always empathized with the vulnerable position I put myself in, because I prioritized their consent over my pleasure.
Telling a partner that you have a sexually transmitted infection (STI), such as genital herpes, may not be easy, but it’s necessary.